Showing posts with label Independent Poetry. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Independent Poetry. Show all posts

Wednesday, 2 May 2018

OCD


Who put my honour between my legs?
I'm sure as hell I didn't.
You know my OCD quite well
and I expect you not to fiddle.
I assigned it to my indestructible head
or my fiery heart within.
But never did I place such a valuable thing
in my flimsy sheet of hymen.

Monday, 30 April 2018

If I were a City (Independent Poem)


There's a lake at my heart
And by it's ghats
Pigeons follow feeders' quirks
A market of ethnic jeweller
Cuts the monotony

And what is my ethnic you may ask
It is blood and bedroom violence
Of body politics and informed silence
Children, however,
Read it as the glorious past

Puddles through roads
Nobody cares where they come from
Has there been a sewage leak?
Has the underbelly finally given in
To centuries of consumption?

Marigold trees, like hopes, on sidewalks
No, the government didn't put them
They're mine, I water them,
They die every winter,
I sow yet again.

I get tourists
They call it a party town
Hippies, Junkies, Broken Hearts, Lovers
Politicians who never made it big
They fancy expensive hotels
They leave in the mornings

An Open Letter To My Ex

Don't ask me how I feel when I dont smile back at you
Or when I walk "with my collars up high"
Pretend you didn't notice me

Don't ask me why I don't talk
anymore or take calls
Or why I don't eat my favorite meals
Pretend you don't care like you always did

Don't ask me why I don't sing
those whacky songs anymore
Or why my guitar stays desolate
Pretend you didn't hear those sounds

Don't ask me where did I go
Or why I didn't leave a message
Pretend like I was always a
stranger to you

Don't ask my name, my trace
Or remember my voice, my face
Pretend like you have amnesia

Don't reminisce those days
When you walk by those alleys
Pretend you're lost, like always

Don't stare at me
As if you need answers
There were no questions to
Begin with

Don't come back
Or look back
Don't call my name
Forget about me.
Pretend pretend pretend.

©

Saturday, 28 April 2018

you dream, you achieve


Do dreams come true?
every time i think about it,
a deep thought i go through,
leaving me with a sack of questions and solutions just a few.

what do you wish to get?
where do you want to stand at?
with a cheerful mind and with no regrets,
tough or easy you want to go through it yet,

if you dream and if you want to make it real,
there's no one on this earth to stop you or at you who would yell,

you dream, you achieve,you dream you achieve,
don't stop dreaming, it is the first step to reach high,
work on it until you achieve it, to your heart you just tie,
nothing is impossible remember it till you die,

you reap what you did sow,
no stopping your heart, a big "NO",
end won't be reached you would be always left with....
yeah! there's still a long way to go..


He says "I am Beautiful", I say I am not.


He says "I am Beautiful",
                                I say I am not.

I say that I am not worthy of him,
But still he holds my hand in public.
Others stare as if he is going along with an unusual human being,
But he has that handsome smile over his face "irresistible" answering them back.
I see this lean, fair girl passing by,
I wonder why am I nothing like her?
But there he comes and just ruffles my not so Perfect hair, with a promise.
I try and fit all those Perfect Girls for him in all our snaps replacing me,
With tears in my eyes;
But there he is, clicking more of us and deleting none.
Clubbing with him, finding girls buzzing around him,
Thinking of me as his 'just a friend';
Holding that glass in my hand I wonder why is he with me?
Well again, he takes me to the dance floor and dances on my favourite number.
He holds "me" right infront of everyone,
He embraces "me" when am in doubt,
He smiles and somehow takes it all away,
He dances on "my" favourite song,
He intertwines his fingers with "mine",
He likes it when he snaps it with "me".

Am still in doubt!
I am not even near to being perfect,
I am not lean and I am not pretty,
Then what is it that he wants?
Will he hurt me like others did?
Is it just for fun or forever?

I think and re-think;
He holds me from the back,
I say it again,"I am not beautiful"
And there he is holding me, staring in my eyes and saying, "You are way too perfect to be called Beautiful"


Sunday, 15 April 2018

Womb

Womb
.
In the sacred womb
a seep of God’s breathe starts to knit
with all His Glory and Deep Love
into a heartbeat, a new life
beating to be loved
to be wrapped tenderly
to be gazed at and to be believed in.
Came out crying hungry is a beautiful sign
a baby’s first task is to suckle mother’s breast
how a newborn fought hard to survive in its first minutes
The Creator gleaming and instilling all strength
on the infant lips

in all its helplessness.
.
-graceliagangmei

Sunday, 1 April 2018

Paakhi


 Hawaaon se jo maanga hissa mera
 To badle main hawa ne saans di
 Akelepan se chedi jab guftagoo
 Mere dil ne aawaaz di

Paakhi

All I ask
Is You

Paakhi.

Everything is a desert sky
                   And white, expansive, obsolete
Eyes are pools, molten sentiments
Muted, inexpressible

Paakhi.

Snow abound, our frail paradise
                        Here, in Dalhousie.
After Manikpur, the air in my lungs
Was forced between the teeth
Cutting my heart
                Shame seeking forgiveness

Paakhi.

I see
Deadness, in your
Slow gestures, your will to stop
                                      But breathe

Paakhi.

I betrayed you
and now that I stand before you
                                       by you 
remember the brush strokes
                    Our coloured canvas

Paakhi.

The last leaf hanging by the branch
                                       Will be me
                                       Will be mine

There were
 no more lie than there was the truth
A roving heart was anchored
I drowned

Paakhi.


* Inspired by the ending scenes of the movie LOOTERA.

Pul Bangash Trees

Pul Bangash tress,
running behind the metro seats.
To steal a glance,
a window seat I prance.
The soundproof metro doors, make
your afternoon melodies go underboard.
Distanced by a glassed transparency,
you peek-a-boo with an inconsistence.

I see you every day, between
Kashmere Gate to Kohat Enclave.
Familiar amidst the strange passengers;
losing your sight is the only danger.
Eyes yearning to touch, skin longing
to clutch. Trying-failing, failing-
trying to photograph, instead stacking
a series of blur yellow-green contrast.

Here I am, a daily commuter,
writing hopelessly—yet hoping
that one day, the clouds will shower
these lines during Delhi rains. 

Friday, 30 March 2018

Here

So much freedom as I sit
I see none but feel all
waiting waiting
I am a waiter
I only wait for you
To feel Your Images more
A room divider
In veils…in shades…
Just You and me
Here.
Tolerant safe space
Uttering my slippery tongue
Help me!
With this ongoing disturbing images
Old flames burning
As I sit with You
You stoop down
To cleanse my feet
How could You?
I buried my face on my knees
My green lens replaced by Your loving Lens
Cleansing me layer by layer
Your Blood slashing the poisonous purple veins creeping on my back
I see only darkness dying
Clapping with thankfulness
In my shakened serenity
I sing You a love song
My cleansed feet ready to walk
To those You love
Release my ears like You hear
To listen broken voices
Grasping every solitude
To talk to You
To hear You say each day
‘I am Your Pillow
Your Confide.’

Thursday, 29 March 2018

unfinished lines


_

Centennial sway of Rodin's hands
Unraveling our arms

Sculpted legs
Sinking in deep naps

our consummated kiss,
its taste no one will have its recipe.

Dilated pupils and wet eyes,
Whispering make my love fly home safe.

Highlighting a moment of unutterable groaning
A cracked golden radiance of Kintsugi.

_

GraceliaGangmei

Sunday, 4 March 2018

Chimera flights





Stealing through the pre dawn dark
And the fey woods, the phantom mist,
Gentle azure, steely cobalt, like a water
creature roiled and stirred from its repose
gliding sylphlike over some great boggy
wetland, has its underbelly tickled by blades of
grass agleam with twilight dew, its cheeks
cooled by the mossy branches of pine trees
standing single file like a ghostly platoon
of sentry men guarding the secrets
of this strange, chimeric woodland, as a
morning horizon unfolds in the colours
of a woman unplaiting her auburn hair,
and the mist
swerves by the foothills of some great
silt and limestone mountain,
and swoops by a basalt rock shaped
like a knock kneed harridan,
and flits by a boggy grotto that must yet
harbour a slumberous fairy tale troll,
and tip toes by the sculptures of the riverbed,
an elfin creature crafted from granite and the
turnings of this earth and the flight of the stars
and the howl and the laughter of the wind,
and the mist
swirls and curls into itself atop a bayou upon whose
body a phantasmal world tosses its colours:
sandstone whites, marshland greys, dahlia pinks,
and the oranges and vermilions and crimson blankets
of autumn leaves in which this languorous world
wraps itself and goes to sleep, all kaleidoscopic
hues that bleed and unfurl into a strange
prismatic phantasmagoria,
and the mist,
above which half this world adrift, mountain tops
standing footless in a void like floating temples,
trees like the masts of ghost ships sticking out of
a shapeless pool of white, like what grand sails
must the world harbour underneath, and the susurrus
beckoning of a veiled distance by the snap of a
dry twig, by leaves crackling underfoot, by the
rustle of trees that sound much like rainfall,
always stirs me, 
standing in a metro line, 
or staring out the window at a city which,
to my view,
often unfolds on an overcast day,
like the onset of glaucoma.


Leaving a Lover

You treat him like a mother would a child. Press him close to your chest, clutch his hair and brush your lips across his cheeks.
He is especially silent tonight?
You push his blonde fringe out of the way & lick his lips. He bites you back, half-heartedly. His kisses are lazy. They are no longer curious; tongues press but don’t probe.
He holds your hair back but doesn’t tangle his fingers in them or push a curl aside to bite your neck.
His sleep is heavy; he is especially silent tonight?
His silence interrupted only by snorting.
His body has been still for the past 2 hours the only movement — his small chest heaving.
The back of your head hurts, the nape of your neck is stiff, your nose is stuffed and hair is greasy.
You pick up a pen because She listens.
The silence spins louder than the ceiling fan.
He leaves you feeling empty like a bad habit.
He is especially silent tonight?
Morning comes around, a pink faced child runs up to us —
“Hi Aunty! Hi Uncle!”
“Hi Cuteness!”
“She just called you Aunty”

He skips down the stairs, happy to hear the morning birds.
You skip, miss a step and tumble down to a silence.
A silence that lasts the auto-ride-of-shame.
You feel like a wife; the disagreeable half in a relationship that leaves a lot unsaid.
You catch his eye as he looks at himself in the rearview mirror.
You give him a small embarrassed smile.
He smiles back, you look away.
He is especially silent.

Look Up

I wish I could go back to
A time without smartphones
when (the lack of) notifications —
 instant, intrusive, attention-seeking —
wouldn’t make me feel blue.

Perhaps I would find skills to hone or
learn how to play the trombone.
Perhaps I would make a silly schedule and set aside
time for counting stars.

I would heal oft-ignored scars
with indulgent bubble baths
and when the wastage of water
induces my mother’s wrath,
I’d pour her a vodka-tonic from
my father’s mini-bar.

Perhaps I’d plan an impromptu trip
to a village next door,
and escape secretly without
status updates or a social media furore.

Perhaps I’d climb a hillock,
peppered with attention depleters —
Blue Ticks, Read Receipts and Last Seens —
I’d line them up and make them walk the plank.

Armed with my new found attention span
I’d make my way to the nearest river bank,
where I’d fashion Gods and Monsters out of shape-shifting clouds
and be unconcerned with the whereabouts of my man.
x

Saturday, 3 March 2018

Come Back, April

Come back, April
shine on my face.
I miss how warmly
you used to hug me.
I know, I know,
I’ve been rude
like a cold
December night.
But, trust me,
I’ll change. Look into my eyes.
I’ll not crib like a
July afternoon,
when life gets harsh.
Will learn all the
romantic ways of an
October evening.
I swear, I’ll not be moody like
August afternoons.
My sweetness will melt
you, like a typical
March morning.
Spring is not spring
without you.
I know where I went wrong.
I know
you left because of my
“I hope Winters come soon” outrage.
This time it’ll be different.
I give you my word.
For this time, I’ll kiss the petals,
not pluck.
For this time, I’ll let your fragrance flourish,
not contain.
For this time, I’ll even let those eyes
appreciate your beauty, and 
not get jealous.
For this time, I’ll love you, for
not stop loving you.



Masculinity 101

I am not here to tell you to love your kid
though I really hope you do.
He really won’t love himself
unless you love yourself too.

80’s glorified Rambo and the Terminator,
hypermasculinity became the new norm.
Schwazeneggar and Stallone demanded men
to look like Greek Gods,
kids were taking steroids in every dorm.

Broad chest, six packs, arms that can lift a fiat,
they’ll constantly tell him to be a 
‘manly man’.
Fist on the wall, he’ll scream really hard,
let his tears trickle down his face and 
not fry his emotions in a pan.

While millions of Adonises 
collect likes on social media, 
you tell him 
muscles will never be the mark of masculinity.
Really hear what he has to say, dont just listen,
teach him to embrace his own sensitivity.

Expose your dark side to him,
let the light slide in through those cracks.
The insecurities you harboured as a man
will dissolve,
He will emulate the person 
you become
so dont fall back.

You in all your enoughness,
teach him that he’s enough too.
Real men aren’t afraid of losing a job,
or the new life their wife is trying to brew.

He’s not your dream project project,
you might want to stop.
Why is your childlikeness appreciated,
when his childishness is not?




Words


All I want is to communicate
Communicate without speaking
A pun to my silence
A pun to the matter that I possess               
Regarded as a burden on the earth
A taunt that I carry everyday
 The human race  is made up of words
Billions of words and  trillions of thoughts that emerged from them
Words can ignite the flames of sensation of love
Words  can create horrendous destruction
Words can save anybody’s life
Words can kill a person with its slightest misuse      
They will create confusion  when you'll unable to find good in goodbyes
Sometimes the words which bring two people together
 become the reason of  forever pain
Words which brings variety
Doesn’t give an instance of uniformity
We are all conned up by the fusion of words
And finally we ended up in confusion.
So  
I better be silent
Not to dive in the pool of words
Because I am  hydro-wordo-phobic.

Nothing holds permanent

Everything change within,
And holds no permanent
Like the seasons takes turn.
Perhaps laughter and Joy,
That of sorrows and tears.
Feelings that linger upon.
Cease to grown from within
None holds eternal.

Sweet Serenade

As I strolled around, 
On an early winter
The fog grew thick.
From a far distance
I heard a serenade.
Sweet, calm and peaceful.
That warms my heart
Dismissing all fears.
Surely that expressive pieces
I heard is consequential.
I has a story to tell.
Was it of endearing love,
Or that last won battle
Was it of successful harvest
From the sow that reap.
Though I know not
That existing facts,
And the motives 
May left unconfirmed.
Still it muses anyone
Who lend their ears
Its a perfect masterpiece.

Friday, 2 March 2018

The Distant Smile





Below the clear dark blue roof
Where life was rushing aloof
Day felt as hot as cake in an oven,
By the wind all the clouds were far off driven.

There among the flock,
An unrealistic juncture stuck my clock,
Where among the crowd there was a distant smile,
A smile which just touched my heart and not just for a while.

I walked closer to the heart stealing smile,
Waves of miracle rushed through my soul,
Apparently it gave me a happy moment with a mesmerizing goal,
A smile which I wanted to make all mine and for me it had to play a greater role.

Clouds of thought rushed to my mind about the priceless smile i had met,
I couldn't make it all mine but never do I regret.

Beauty of life


 When higher above the sky becomes darker,
When life within you feels encumbered by desire and anger,
When your  surrounding gets provoked and disturbed,
Within you the harmony gets removed and denied,

Not descending yourself low below the sea,
Uncovered opening up your eyes you see,
Sky is excessively clearer above the shaded cloud,
Bright side is always awaiting for you more greener with no drought,

With bigger dreams, with higher goals you live,
Fly for your smile and who needs it to them the smile you give,
Why to waste time on slush when it could be dried up with a wave of breath,
Love endlessly for love only spreads love and not wrath,

The problems are smaller but inside you scrabble,
For a moment take a pause and peace you do assemble,
Regain the beauty of life, for sooner or later the phase will pass with time,
Throw the stress aside for you are stronger than the waves of ocean at every line.

World is prettier than the garden full of tulips, you just need to feel the beauty of life,
 and that smile of yours is very precious and don’t let anyone to make you feel low.