Self-Reflective Note

I registered for this course because I was tired of telling people that I didn’t reciprocate to poetry; even without giving myself a chance. I had always said that prose worked best for me. So, the intention for picking this course was to tickle my poetic-bone (if there’s anything like that). And, I can’t thank Akhil enough for re-introducing poetry in such an incredible manner.

My first poem for the class, ‘Of Love’ was a total fail. It had more commas than words. Thematically, I had tough time breaking down and categorizing the word ‘love’. To me, each poem I wrote throughout the semester was about love. So, I penned things which—even thinking about brought peace to my mind. Because I was writing in winters, the imageries turned out to be relating to that particular season. For example, in this poem I talked about hot baths and woolen gloves.

“sniffing beloved’s woolen glove.”

“of a hot bath.”

Had I written it in April, the mode of both bathing and clothing would’ve changed. This brought me to an understanding that while writing a poem or prose, the surrounding physical conditions also have a role to play. The following week, while writing ghazal, the influence of my surrounding experiences reflected in my writing. During that time, I took a lot of trips to Jama Masjit. Hence, my ghazal, ‘Ittar Shop’ is also set in one of the narrow lanes surrounding Jama Masjit.

“Seeing you pass by Jahan Numa, they swell tonight.”

The ghazal talks about unrequited love (an extension of the Love Poem week, maybe?). Ittar was central to my ghazal, and it goes back to my experience of buying it a day before.

“Two kohl eyes met in my Ittar shop tonight.”

Poets like Faiz, Gulzar, and Ahmad Faraz are all I can think of when it comes to ghazals. But after reading Agha Shahid Ali’s ghazals in English, I was overwhelmed in excitement. And I quote Nitoo Das, “There can only be one Tonight.” I enjoyed reading and writing ghazal and villanelle the most (emphasis). Initially, I was petrified, given the set schemata. I thought it will cut slack of my creativity but the more constrictive it became, the more I explored the mnemonics of writing poems. The rules paved a path for me, urging to explore the un-explored. Forget writing, I even loved editing my ghazal—keeping the syllable count in check and making it more compact with each revision. Yet I feel, it is still unfinished and will always be.

Political poetry week taught me a lot of things. I wrongfully perceived it to be an easier exercise. I was too naïve to think that once you identify your politics, the work is done. For instance, my political poetry was about the curfew in Kashmir which was imposed on the day of Eid in 2016. While writing, I was clear about my subject matter and the tools which I were to be employed in the poem. But after getting feedback from Akhil, I realized I was ‘too’ clear about the subject matter. What I was trying to convey was very apparent or say—right in the face. I recognized the art of subtlety while writing a poem and the importance of abstracting your idea. Not everything has to be right there—on the page, in solid words. I learnt that not everything needs to be served on the platter for readers. This point was also bought up while getting feedbacks from Nitoo Das where she advised to omit using italics. When you italicize the non-English words, you are unconsciously putting words into hierarchy of what should stand out and what should not. Why should they stand out for the readers after all? Writers should put the responsibility of researching the non-English words onto the shoulders of readers. Writing response poems to Nitoo Das was difficult because I didn’t know what to say but appreciate her skill of writing poems.

One of the most crucial things which I learnt during the span of four months was the art of criticism. Each class began with an exercise to identify one line which worked and one which we’d like to change in a poem. This, I think was the most constructive way of criticizing somebody’s work. So, the know-how of this constructive approach was as much important as writing a poem. Feedback from my cohort was really helpful and it definitely turned my poems into better ones.

Classes on syllables and structuring was very crucial for me. I learnt about all this in one semester as much as I never did during my three years as a Literature student. I learnt a lot of things from the first week of writing poetry to the last. I refrained from using words just like that—in the air. I tried not to casually use universal and grand ideas. One of the most important things which I will always keep in mind—you have to labor enough to use clichés. A poet has to earn his/her right to use clichés. Besides, I became more aware of the context of the words I was picking. I held back from casually using words like “life” and “truth” in poems.

Another thing, which I personally call the ‘cheat-sheet’ was the RhymeZone website. But it was helpful too. While looking for rhyming words, I ended up forming lines which I would have never thought of otherwise. Classroom exercises on line-enjambment, simile and especially on prosody helped a lot while editing the poems. It was altogether, an enriching workshop. Thank you, truly.